Incoming!!!

[Zillatain]

Hmm... The Cola Wars have started earlier than expected. No matter.

Zillatain simultaneously pets three contently purring ninja kittens while pushing a button labeled "WCP Beyond Overkill Barrage".

Kajin is thrown from his seat as the entire port side of the ship cover is penetrated by a hundred thousand Pepsi bottles. The caps pop off and begin to flood the ship with not Pepsi, but Wild Cherry Pepsi.

One of the kittens hisses at the monitor showing the ship.

[Funky Honky]

Finally! Things had been getting pretty dull around here of late. Time to up the ante...

::commences loading the cannon with Jolt::

[Kajin]

Noooooo! Not Wild Cherry!

Kajin hops into a lifeboat as The Pillar of Autumn's engine core goes critical, blowing up half the battlefield in a massive atomic fireball. The lifeboat lands in the midst of a swarm of ninja kittens

Oh, great. Ninja kittens. This is going to be rough.

[Ross_Varn]

A towering pillar of smoke and shadow comes rushing from Ross's still body. Twin blazing red eyes form, and from it's gaping maw it utters,

"RISE, AVATAR OF DESTRUCTION! MAKE THE LAND THE CONTESTED ONE!"

A blaze of fire churns away under Kajin's touchdown point. As he hurtles towards the ground, the ground rises to meet him... and he crash lands in the side of a very large hill. Debris of what seem to be a thousand wars coat it's surface. At the top of the hill is a solitary lawn chair, occupied a rather menacing looking man with a flaming skull for a head. He lowers a large tankard of suspicious looking liquid, and looks about, slightly confused. "Well, it's my bloody hill, but it looks like someone split the timestream again. You lot can have it." He strolls off, taking the chair with him, and disappears into a haze that resembles a rather large pub, promptly disappearing.

The Shadow Ross looks rather confused at this turn of events, then shrugs and settles on the top of the hill, chuckling at Kajin. "Mine."

[Kajin]

"Hold up a second!" Kajin shouts, calling for a time out. Walking towards the side of the hill, Kajin turns the thermostat all the way down, then pulls out a garden hose and sprays the hillside with it. The hazardous, debris strewn hill is now covered in a thick, even more hazardous sheet of slippery ice.

"If we're gonna play King of the Hill, we might as well play it the way I did growing up." Kajin calls the game back into session, then promptly starts climbing the hill. "Dog Pile on Ross!"

[Zillatain]

Shadow Ross and Kajin are flung off the hill as something explodes out of the top. As the dirt and ice dissipates, the Kool-Aid Man is seen standing defiantly on the top of the hill.

"Oh yeah! Mine!" he declares.

Kajin starts getting up, when he is nearly run over by a bright red bull that is stampeding up the hill towards Kool-Aid Man.

"Oh no!" Kool-Aid Man shouts as he reaches into his pitcher and brings out a KPG (Kool-Aid Propelled Grenade) and aims at the Red Bull. As he is lining up the shot, a tire bounces off his side.

"Not so fast you knave!" the Michelin Man says as he throws another tire.

[Jorodryn]

I'm curious... are there only going to be actual product mascots or will there be movie product mascots too? for example the Staypuft Marshmallow Man.

[Zillatain]

You'll have to ask Kajin about that, since he cut off the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man's leg to make s'mores.

[Steave]

"Mr Steave?"

"Yessir!"

"Inventory of munitions Mr Steave?"

"Sir! Beer sir! Lots of beer!"

"Very well Mr. Steave. Load the cannons with the ... with ... um ... Reverse course Mr. Steave!

"Yessir!"

[Kajin]

"Steave has beer! After him!"

[hexnut]

tut,tut, gather intelligence before battle. What kind of beer?

[Funky Honky]

Good question, let's find out.

::GAWK::

Hey Steave, what'cha got?

[Steave]

"Incoming transmission sir!"

"Patch it through Mr. Steave."

"Hey Steave, What'cha got?"

"That's a good question. Mr. Steave? What do we have?"

"Have sir? In the way of beer sir? Mostly Belgium sir! A few Russian! Nice porter in that lot sir! Some local brews sir! Very good lemon lime radler from the north sir!"

"Very good Mr. Steave patch me through."

"Yessir!"

"Captain Honky? I've got nothing. Not a damned thing. End transmission."

"Full speed ahead Mr. Steave."

[Funky Honky]

Uh... Steave? I'm standing right behind you (and beside you and in front of you apparently). You forgot my chair got reactivated again, didn't you.

[Steave]

"Ahhhhhhh ..."










"Mr. Steave!"

"Yessir!"

"Guest on deck Mr. Steave. Fetch the man a beer!"

"Sir. Yessir!"