weatherwax wrote:Elaine watches Killthrust plunk himself at the bar.
"Smaug!" she calls, pointing at Killthrust. "He'll take something hard!"
She glances at the table holding Ron, and does a double take, elbowing Bruce.
"Oy, Brucie, front row show!" she says with a grin. "Smaug! I'll take something sweet."
Smaug hands Killthrust something strong and Elaine something sweet. "Y'know, when I was working the brothel last night, someone ordered the exact same thing. Verbatim." He chuckles as he cleans a glass.
FreakyBoy wrote:Bruce adds to the order, "Just something. And leave the bottle!" He then grabs a chair from a nearby table, plops it down next to Ron, and takes a seat. He bellows, "You heard the boy. Next!"
"Ugh, recruiting for the prince. Not the greatest job, but it beats the census." You realize that you recognize the voice from your head while you were filling out the census.
A farm boy walks up to the table. Blonde and hero material. Ron pulls a piece of paper out of thin air.
"Luke. Says here you're a moisture farmer. What the hell is that?"
"No. Nevermind. It has moist in the name. You're life's story is boring, but take solace in the fact that it's better than your dark wizard father's life, which is such complete ☠☠☠☠ that I know someone who is rewriting it."
The boy huffs off.
"Seriously! A knighted wizard and a farm boy have failed to be hero material. I'm thinking about just asking Smaug over there. He's a bartender and
a pimp. That's pure antihero material." Smaug drops the glass. He tries to pick up the pieces. He cuts his thumb.
"Owowowowowowowowowowow!" He screams. He shows his thumb to Elaine as he looks away from it. "Is it bleeding?"