The puns, the puns!

[Kea]

What do you call a pimp for male prostitutes?
A manager of man nadgers.
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What do you call the ex-Nazi soldier who set up an animal hospital?

[LeoChopper]

A veteran Aryan veterinarian. But what would you call a loft for insane water birds? Or to steal one of my favorites, the two pitiable itinerant philosophers?

[drachefly]

A loony bin on the first, not sure of the second.

What do you get when you cross Giorgio Armani with Jimmy Hoffa?

[hexnut]

I would imagine, a very expensive cement overcoat. What I want to know is, why the indigent railway train supervisor can step on the third rail with impunity?

[gregnier]

Because he's a bad conductor.

I once caught the energizer bunny and made hossenfeffer... for some reason i got arrested when i seasoned it...

[LeoChopper]

A poor conductor; he's indigent, not incompetent. Also, for the record, I was thinking of a lunatic loon attic - just to keep the same format as Kea. Otherwise, what's to stop us from asking things like why Von Doom always gets rotten vegetables? And from there, it's only time before that snake and his world-destroying switch show up.

[drachefly]

Yes, you're right, I broke format.

I would imagine, a very expensive cement overcoat.

That's a decent one. I was thinking... the head of the seamsters' union.

[Funky Honky]

I once caught the energizer bunny and made hossenfeffer... for some reason i got arrested when i seasoned it...

Since it's out there, I should mention that then tend to frown on it when you combine a salt and battery.

What did the college professor celebrate after a decade of steady employment?

[CCC]

His ten-year tenure.

What would be used to provide electrical power to a tree favoured for roosting by microchiroptera?

[hexnut]

I don't think they need much power, so you could get away with powering the entire micro-bat tree with a micro battery.

Just to mix things up; What would you call the financial investments of a military installation named after a viral infantile paralysis disease?

[AlternateTorg]

I'd imagine they'd call it the Fort Polio Portfolio.

Why did the Buddhist monk refuse Novocaine when he got a root canal?

[LeoChopper]

It's said he wanted to transcend dental medication, though maybe he didn't want to miss out on nerve drama, or thought you shouldn't mix an ascetic with anesthetic. On that note, the philosophers were a pair of pathetic peripatetics - it's not obvious, but I thought maybe someone else would remember the line from Calvin & Hobbes. Maybe it's better to ask why Hollywood's top feline celebrities are so good at starting chemical reactions?

[CCC]

I don't think they need much power, so you could get away with powering the entire micro-bat tree with a micro battery.

Well, I was just thinking of a bat tree battery, but that's even better.

Maybe it's better to ask why Hollywood's top feline celebrities are so good at starting chemical reactions?

Because they're A-list cat catalysts.

Why did the simian with a PhD hang from the curtain rail?

[drachefly]

Dr. Ape hung his drapes.

<.<

>.>

Haven't got one of my own ready, sorry.

[hexnut]

In that case I will ask: If you have birds nesting on your horse's head, why is a common baker's leavening ingredient the best way to make the birds go away?